My big girl turns 5 next month, which means I have been out of work (the get-up-get-dressed-go-to-a-place-other-than-your-home-and-stay-there-for-8-hours-while-using-your-college-degree kind of work) for almost 5 years. Hard to believe. I was on the ball back then. I felt mentally and physically sharp, and I had way fewer gray hairs. I didn't argue with people at work over lollipops, and I don't recall ever uttering the phrase "You really don't need to smell the poopy right now." I had people telling me what to do, but they weren't 31 inches tall.
Five years later, I'm a total scatterbrain, and I'm ready for bed by 8pm (not that I actually go to bed at 8!). New gray hairs pop up every single day (why can't they lie flat like all the other color hairs?). I argue with tiny tyrants over Rice Krispie treats (no, they are not lunch) and jeans vs. leggings (you're 2, why do you have an opinion about what you wear?). I clean up offensive smelling solids and liquids several times a day. My day is spent meeting the endless demands of people under 4 feet tall.