If you think maturity comes with age, you are sooooooo stupid! Or you've never met my husband. Nothing entertains that guy more than a good fart, fart story, or anything flatulent-related. And I'm the first to admit that his amusement is rather contagious. This fact will be important later in this post.
My guff-loving husband and I were registered for a race with a Valentine's Day theme, and I thought it would be fun to register as a couple since we had that option. He refused to sign up as a couple last year, so I thought I'd hit him up again and see if he'd go for it this year. Again, he was against it...typical "table for one" behavior from Ryan, as his mother likes to put it. So I did a little research on last year's couples' race times, and I thought Ryan and I could finish in the top 10 if we both had really good races. Knowing how competitive he is, I informed Ryan of my findings, which was pretty much the same thing as dangling a carrot in front of a rabbit's nose. I saw that glimmer in his eye, and knew a great team name would push him over the edge and into submission. I knew the obvious alliterations like "The Pspeedy Psimases" and "Psimas Psweethearts" would be too cheesy for my guy Ry, so I really had to dig deep here.
And this is where Ryan's love of farts comes into the story. What's even funnier than a fart? A shart, of course. ***If you don't know what a shart is, I'm afraid you'll just have to Google it. Or watch "Along Came Polly."*** I knew Ryan would enjoy the name Team Shart, but I think it was the slogan that sealed the deal:
TEAM SHART: BLOWING AWAY THE COMPETITION AND LEAVING THEM IN OUR TRACKS!
Yeah, when I married Ryan, it was so we could grow old together...we never said we'd grow up, too!
Not to discount the Valentine's Day theme of the race, I Fancied up the sleeves to add a cheesy component to the sharts...I mean shirts:
Team Shart fared well, despite the cold and windy weather at race time. I beat my goal time by three minutes, Ryan finished in under an hour, and we placed 5th as a couple. With the Shamrock half marathon just five weeks away, there is no rest for the weary. We'll need to come up with some lofty goals for ourselves for this race and try to live up to the Team Shart slogan. With Ryan's contagious "suck it up" training mentality and the luck of the Irish on our side (not to mention the promise of free beer at the finish line), I think we'll be alright.